December 10, 2008 to January 28, 2009 – Happy Birthday Katelynn and Daria

To my dearest Katelynn and Daria,

The two of you have now been with us for a year, and what an amazing journey it has been.  A year ago to this day, you decided to make your grand entrance into the world fifteen weeks ahead of schedule.  While both of you have officially turned one, you are still playing catch up with your development tracking at roughly 8.75 months adjusted age.  It is truly a miracle to look back at how small the two of you were at birth.  Katelynn, it seemed as though you barely registered on the scale at 1 pound 8 ounces at birth, but look how far you have come to be a full 16 pounds 5 ounces at your weigh-in yesterday.  Likewise, Daria, your tiny 1 pound 9 ounce birth weight has climbed up to 15 pounds 7 ounces.  As great as this is, both of you girls still need to gain more weight to help with your physical and mental development.  If you could only see how much effort your mother and I have put in during the time you came home to help you grow.

Somehow, there is still a relentless force driven by your extreme prematurity that is working hard against us in keeping both of you properly nourished.  We have brought you to see your pediatrician, a dietician, and three speech pathologists/feeding therapists to do whatever we can to make sure you thrive.  Just yesterday, we spoke with your dietician and agreed that it is now time to have a pediatric gastroenterologist examine both of you to see what can be done with the persistent acid reflux that seems to adapt itself, first to Zantac, then next to the Prevacid medications that have become a part of your daily lives.  As much as your mother and I fear the thought of having a gastric feeding tube, or G-tube, placed in one or both of you to make sure you are nourished, we are working hard to prepare ourselves to accept this as a possibility.  I just wish you both could reassure us that we haven’t failed you as your parents.  It just breaks our hearts to think that we have tried all we can and it may still come down to the fact that we were not able to feed you as normal parents should.  Then again, there is nothing about this past year that has been even close to being “normal.”  We are now waiting to get the appointment with the GI doctor set so we can find out what our options are.  The dietician tells us that she has worked with kids for over twenty years and has seen how much relief a G-tube has provided to patients, but what is more important to your mother and me is knowing that we are doing what is best for the two of you in the long-term.  As it was explained to us, the goal is the make sure the two of you take in enough nourishment in your early development, since it will have a great impact on attributes such as intelligence.  I promise you that your mother and I will do whatever we can to help both of you be the best you can be.

As gloomy as everything may seem, Katelynn and Daria, please know that since December 9^th of last year, many special things have happened.  We had the opportunity to celebrate Christmas together as a family of five.  Mommy even put up the two special ornaments I bought for you from Disney World when I had to be away on business last October.  I can’t wait until you’re old enough to understand their significance.  After putting the year behind us, you also had the chance to wish your big brother Adam a very happy sixth birthday at his party.  While you were too young to join Adam and his friends to watch Bolt in 3-D at the theater, you sure did get a lot of attention at Steve’s Pizza.  January is full of other birthdays too, as we took Grandpa Owyang out to lunch for his birthday.

Four days ago, on the 24^th, we had a very special birthday party for the two of you at Grandpa’s restaurant, Fortune House.  We invited family and special friends that played a special role in taking care of our family while the two of you were in the hospital for the first three and a half months of your lives, and even after you came home last May.  About forty people came to your party and we could have invited even more people, but we wanted to keep it smaller so Mommy and I could whisk you away quickly for your afternoon feeding and nap.  The two of you were so adorable in your pink and gray dresses, and I think Mommy did a fantastic job in making a laminated, magnet-backed photo of the two of you as a party favor. 

We also celebrated Chinese New Year on the 26^th, and it happens to be the year of the Ox.  That’s Daddy’s Chinese zodiac animal, so it means I’m turning thirty-six this year.  Can you believe it?  What’s even more amazing is how the two of you and your big brother did not fall into the zodiac animal designations  you were supposed to be because the of the Chinese lunar calendar.  If the two of you were born in May around your due dates, or even if you weren’t so early, you would have been born in the year of the Rat, Mommy’s zodiac animal.  Instead, you came so prematurely, you were born at the end of the year of the Boar.  Adam did the same thing and was born in the year of the Horse instead of the Ram.  We’ll just keep confusing our non-Chinese friends with this bit of family trivia for the rest of our lives.

So what else has happened in the past two months?  Well, President Obama was sworn in last week and this is significant because he’s the first African-American president in the history of our nation.  We pray that he’ll do all he promises to do to help our country get back on its feet, especially with how bad our economy has been.  Daddy still counts his blessings every day that he not only employed, but given the awesome privilege of working from home.  We don’t know how we would do it if I was away from you during this time.  More importantly, Daddy thanks God that his medical benefits have helped cover the costs we have incurred with your births.  Would you believe that the bills have hit just about $2 million for the two of you?  You are both miracle babies and are priceless in every sense!

Katelynn and Daria, as long, difficult and scary as it has been for us this past year, you two have been an inspiration not only to me, but so many others.  Katelynn, you have shown me just how strong you are by defying the odds after experiencing a grade IV intra-ventricular hemorrhage, the worst possible classification.  You battled through a couple of life-threatening bacterial infections, the potential loss of your vision, a frightening bout of infection-induced seizures, and multiple surgeries.  Still, you smile at me and Mommy everyday with the love and trust that we will do our best to take care of you.  Daria, while you did not experience quite as many medical complications as your sister, you still have shown us how much of a fighter you are.  I still remember how difficult it was to escort you to the John Muir Medical Center in Walnut creek last spring when we learned that your retinopathy of prematurity (ROP) wasn’t getting better after your first round of laser eye surgery.  Those ten days we spent together separated from Mommy, Katelynn and Adam were tough, but seem like nothing compared to the scare we got when they used too much anesthesia on you during the first operation.  When they had to give you Narcan, it was horrifying to see how it made your heart rate and pulse skyrocket so quickly.  Now I look at your bright and cheery eyes everyday and thank the Lord that you have your sight.  Not only that, my heart almost flutters when I witness you using your eyes to enjoy the pleasures of life, like you do when you laugh at your brother dancing around to amuse you. 

Girls, I know it has been really hard to keep a consistent journal of everything that is happening around you on a day to day basis.  Between work, your feedings, spending quality time with you and the rest of the family, and keeping the house in a functional state, I can’t seem to squeeze out a minute without sacrificing time for something else.  I hope that you can keep me accountable and remind me that one day you are going to read this letter as well as the other pages of journaling I have done in our family blog.  I look forward to that time when we can share this as well as the pictures and videos documenting your amazing story.  As Mommy put in your party favors, miracles sometimes come in pairs.  Happy birthday to you both, Katelynn and Daria.  You are and always will be Daddy’s sweethearts.